Dog’s Movie House: “Snake Eyes” Decent But Somewhat Disappointing!”

We start in Washington State twenty years prior to current events. Young Snake Eyes (you never find out his real name) witnesses the murder of his father by an unknown crime lord. The obvious emotional scarring leads him to become a drifter and twenty years later he’s working as a cage fighter. Now played by Henry Golding (“Crazy Rich Asians”), Snake Eyes is recruited into the Yakuza by Kenta (Takehiro Hira) in exchange for the identity of his father’s murderer. That partnership soon fizzles when Snake Eyes refuses to kill his partner Tommy (Andrew Koji) in a show of loyalty to the Yakuza. After escaping, Snake Eyes finds out that Tommy is actually a high ranking member of the Arishekage Ninja Clan and now Snake Eyes finds himself in training to discover the secrets of the Arishekage and eventually join the clan.

A lot more plot follows, some of it good, some of it really convoluted, and by the time you get to the giant, judgement rendering anacondas or the mystical stone that can vaporize anything in front of it, you’re either with this movie or you’re not. I was on the fence, myself. The acting and story are fine. Golding is very good as the title character, dancing through a somewhat inconsistently written character on charm alone, and he’s physical enough to do all the convincing stunt work. Kenta is a fine villain and his relationship to GI Joe baddie organization Cobra is established well enough to jump start the potential franchise. Samara Weaving is a talented actress, but aside from her opening scene at the airport, her Scarlett is given very little to do other than provide a gateway into the GI Joe organization. I did like the relationship between Snake and Tommy. Koji does a good job of dramatizing the struggle between anger and his devotion to the clan. Fans of the comic and toys know that Tommy becomes the lethal Cobra ninja Storm Shadow, and this film effectively sets up the emotional rivalry between Tommy and Snake Eyes.

The rest of the international cast performs well enough but their roles are underwritten. Haruke Abe has potential as the clan’s head of security Akiko, but her relationship with Snake Eyes is too inconsistent to really resonate with the audience. She comes off as as a hardass, but demonstrates compassion at the whim of the story’s requirements. It’s frustrating since Abe has a natural chemistry with Golding that could have really provided the film with some solid emotional grounding. My biggest complaint is the use of martial arts legend Iko Uwais as the Hard Master. You don’t let a cinematic martial artist that good do so little onscreen. He has one good scene involving the first challenge with Golding and then he pretty much goes away. Unforgiveable man!

The action is frenetic and well-choreographed for the most part, but director Robert Schwentke (“RED”) has an annoying habit of using the dreaded combo of the quick-cut and the shaky-cam to give the audience more of a sense of nausea than excitement. There are a few scenes where he uses some long shots and slow motion to impressive effect, but the editing alone is enough to recommend you take a Dramamine before seeing the film.

Overall, “Snake Eyes” is a decent film, but somewhat disappointing given the talent involved. This had the opportunity to be a rip-roaring action film using a beloved character from a popular franchise, but instead “Snake Eyes” is merely. . .adequate. And now you know. . .and knowing is half the battle! (Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.) 3 Out Of 5 On Kendog’s Barkometer! So Sayeth The Kendog!

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